10 THINGS THAT I JUST DISCOVERED I STILL DON'T KNOW

1. The social etiquette when you recognise someone at the sexual health clinic. Do you wave? Ask them what they're in for? Pretend you're your own doppelganger? Crawl under the nearest chair?

2. How to turn capitals back into baby letters. It's 2015 and we're preparing to send people to Mars for goodness sake, there MUST be a way. 

3. How to use the oven without setting off the smoke alarm every single time.

4. One word: budgeting. Just because it's Katies birthday next saturday, does not warrant me the right to blow two weeks allowance on a dress and heels. 

5. How to properly take care of my phone. I've had a phone contract since i was 16 and i don't think i've ever successfully made it to the end. My current phone looks like something that's been dropped on the floor twenty eight thousand times which makes sense because it has.

6. Weekly washing. Yet again, my laundry basket is over-flowing and yet again, i've had to resort to buying another pack of Primark's finest. 

7. The art of nail-painting. You might remember my post '20 things i have and haven't learned at 20' in which i mentioned how hilariously shit i am at painting nails. Shock horror, i'm still shit.

8. How much pasta is too much pasta? Forever making enough to feed the bloody five thousand. 

9. What it means not to drunk text. One-too-many glasses of Pinot Grigio and i'm blowing up my phone looking for a sleepover buddy, needy much?

10. How to french-plait. If your Mum didn't french plait your hair as a kid, was she even your Mum? 

Its been a bad-week for me, knowledge wise! Can you relate? Do you have any tips for me? Also, i just realised that this is my 51st post so happy 50 posts to me!! Now, what can i buy myself to celebrate?

- LOVE FROM LORNA, X 

6 TYPES OF GUYS YOU HAVE DEFINITELY COME ACROSS ON TINDER

1. The Guy Who Really Wants You To Know He Works Out 

You know the type, he's either taking a selfie at the gym or he's taking one in the mirror at home without his top on. Does this guy even own a top? Who knows. But he has a six pack. 

2. The Guy Who's Definitely Lying About His Age 

He looks like he's just about ready to sit his GCSE's yet his bio says he's 22? More than likely he's asked his mum if he can have a few of the boys over for FIFA and fish fingers and they're scrolling through tinder together, looking at what the world has to offer them in a few years time. 

3. The Guy Who You Know In Real Life

So you're harmlessly swiping through the nearby hot or not's when you come across someone you actually know. As in, you've actually conversated with this person in the real world. They've seen you without your fancy valencia filter and now they've read your superbly cringeworthy bio. And now you're faced with a decision; do you be polite? Swipe right and have the "hahahah fancy seeing you here" conversation, or do you swipe left as fast as humanely possible because OH MY GOD your secret is out, someone knows you're a tinder-er. 

4. The Guy Who Has a Fit Mate 

The sheer disappointment when it's the less-pretty boys' profile that your swiping through is something we've all felt. Formal petition for tinder to introduce a 'sorry i don't fancy you but your mate is FIT' option please. 

5. The Guy With a Dog and/or Child 

I wonder if there's been a study into the success rate of those using a dog as a prop in their profile, compared to those who don't. Bitches love dogs and bitches love babies- the mentality of 90% of tinder. 

6. The Guy Who Thinks He's Basically David Beckham Because of His Shit Sleeve

Are you guys getting paid to advertise your sleeves?? It's amazing how you manage to slip it in in every single photo. Here's my dog.. and my sleeve. Here's me doing something incredibly fun.. and my sleeve. Quite frankly, it looks weird. Please stop. 

Ahhhh the joys of dating! What do you (single) girls reckon? Have you come across these types of guys during your boring-saturday-night-scroll? Have i missed anyone out? Leave a comment and let me know? 

- LOVE FROM LORNA, X